This post was a freelance piece originally written for Tambwoy.com.
It’s important that we don’t use our sports as a measure of our self-worth.
I wish I could tell this to my younger self, especially when it comes to my soccer-playing days. To put it bluntly, I was a pretty mediocre soccer player, and just didn’t have the skill that was required for joining a club-level team. I really let this affect my self-esteem and felt like this meant I wasn’t good enough, in sports or in life.
When I was younger (and admittedly, there are days where I have felt like this as an adult), if I had a bad practice or game, there were so many times where I just wanted to give up and quit. It seemed like the easy way out — I asked myself what the point of trying was if I wasn’t doing well or just wasn’t loving it that day.
More than anything, I would love to tell my past self that it’s okay. Just because I wasn’t good at soccer didn’t mean I wasn’t a good person, or wasn’t good at other sports, or wasn’t good in school. My soccer ability was not an indicator of my self-worth. I put too much pressure on myself. Instead, I wish I would have enjoyed that time a bit more, even if I wasn’t the best. Playing soccer ultimately led me to try something new (running) which I fell in love with and enjoyed even more. There are plenty of sports and opportunities for everyone out there, and it is important to remember that as amazing as sports are, we shouldn’t become too wrapped up in making them our full identity.
Part of what makes sports so special is that all athletes, regardless of talent, will have good days and bad days. There will be days where you can’t wait to go to your practice or game, and you leave feeling on top of the world because of how well it went. But there are also those days where you can’t seem to get into the groove of your sport, or you’re just tired and need a day of rest. These are normal phenomena and are part of the athletic process. We need a mix of these days in order to grow and become better at our sports. There were so many days where I just wasn’t feeling motivated and it felt like my world was falling apart. But looking back, I wish I had cut myself some slack, and realized that those bad days only made the good days 1,000 percent better.
As a 24-year-old, I can admit that I am still working on listening to my own advice! And while I’m still (relatively) young, I think I’ve managed to learn some great lessons about sports along the way. While I can’t exactly tell these things to my younger self, I hope all young readers out there take these pieces of advice to heart, and become better athletes as a result!